Ireland, what to say about Ireland... I think it's fair to say we were spoiled on our Scotland bus trip as we certainly found this week a lot tougher and less enjoyable. It all started off pretty well as we scrambled to get our appropriate seat on the bus - very important in establishing the social order for the week to come. We go for a middle seat - slightly toward the back as this says 'we're middle of the road, but still cool'. Of course, you have the cool but slightly naughty people in the back seat and the geeks up the front. We also go for seats on the right hand side but I haven't yet worked out what this means.
This weeks group was bigger than Scotland and we soon realised, a different mix of people. Although, of course you have the similarities to last week with the loud mouth Aussie lads, who only bought a pair of jandals for footwear and only T-shirts to keep warm (of course, it's not their fault - they were led astray by the 4 days of good weather in London last week so didn't think it might rain in Ireland). You kind of have to admire them for showing it can be done, but also at the same time you want them to slip off a big rock in their jandals so you can say, 'I told you so'. You also have a similar spectrum of kiwi couples with the 'North Islanders' - this time a couple from Rotorua. You have the 'Southlanders' or 'Westcoasters' this week (actually living in Wellington, but their natural habitat is the coast). And then there is of course, us - the ultra-hip urban liberals.
This time round, we had a bit of a surprise with the stereotypical, ignorant and wealthy Americans - this was a mix of two related families, sans the fathers who were presumably still hard at work financing this shopping trip. This was the Americans first experience in staying at hostels and was great entertainment value. I had to stop myself from laughing when asked on the first night if I'd stayed in hostels before - I tried hard to level with them and said that I wasn't that keen on it either. Good thing is, no matter how much you were suffering this week, you could take comfort in the fact that you knew that it was far more painful for them. Of course, they tried the Jesus trick and turned our free breakfast toast into muffins and bagels on the second morning. 'Opps, we bought too much food, help yourselves...' Clare did her best to help out by pointing out where to get coffee, but it wasn't enough to fulfil someones craving for a Starbucks triple iced frappe mocha latte. Another annoyance was the ultra-neurotic Australian girl, who was finding the whole experience a tad stressful - 'where am I? who am I? Just breathe! I'm going straight to hell!'. Though she might be correct about that last one, you should go to hell for sleeping with the tour guide! If he'd been more interested in acting as a tour guide than pimp daddy we might've had a better time. The most vivid piece of commentary on the bus wasn't about the historical relevance of some castle, but about the great deeds of some footballer from Cork. Of course, I would've posted feedback this feedback of the evaluation forms provided at the end of the tour instead of this blog, except he didn't provide any.
Another thing that adds to the displeasure factor is the endless playing of boring middle of the road pop rock packed onto everyone's ipod that you've heard 10,000 times before. I was reaching for the razorblades this afternoon when they played a James Blunt album and was only able to save myself by imagining the Pogues' Shane MacGowan drunkenly smashing a glass of Guinness into his pretty little face.
We're found the scenery here to be somewhat unspectacular after being in Scotland and I guess it doesn't help being a from NZ... 'you call that a mountain??!!'. A lot of the country-side is scraggy, rolling farmland and looked a lot drier than I expected. I was wondering on the first day if things would look better when raining and was granted that wish as soon as we got to Westport and started walking to the supermarket. The stupid thing about these raining places like Scotland and Ireland is that none of the shops have verandas to stop you getting soaked. Some of the coastal scenery is spectacular and I wished we'd spend more time around these areas.
The Irish are kind of funny with their tourist spots - they've made a huge thing about the cliffs of Moher, having just completed a 30 million Euro tourist centre in the side of the hill. This place is packed with tourists and here you can spend money on the 'Cliffs of Moher Experience' which seems odd when the spectacular cliffs are outside for free. And of course, natural beauty never gets in the way of all your shopping and crappy gift buying needs. The other extreme of the tourist experience is funny little curiosities situated on private land, after many twists and turns down terrible, narrow country lanes. Here you find some crappy, hardy visible sign and realise the ticket office is actually someones uninviting cottage where some old queen of the harpies is waiting to relieve you of your hard earned cash.
Of course then there's Blarney Castle, the Paris Hilton of Irish tourist attractions - famous for being famous. The operators must be laughing all the way to the bank and obviously very thankful to who ever made up the load of BS about kissing the stone. There doesn't even seem to be a decent tale behind the stone, our guide had to make something up. After forking out 8 Euro to get in, you can also throw away another 2.50 to get a certificate that you have to fill in yourself saying you kissed the stone and now possess the gift of eloquence. And of course, because you can't take photos, you'll need to fork out some more to get an official photo of you slobbering the stone. Bah humbug! we decided to spend out cash on some yummy seafood chowder at a local cafe and shelter from the rain instead. Plus we both already have the gift of eloquence.
What the Irish may lack in an abundance of natural beauty, they make up for in their hospitality, nightlife and music - even in rather small places where we stayed, such as Doolan there's no shortage of cosy pubs and good music. It's hard to imagine such fun being had in similar sized places in NZ and this is certainly one thing we'd love to take back home if we could.
And yes, if you couldn't tell from my ranting, I still have my cold :(
We're looking forward to it just being the two of us again as we spend a day in Dublin tomorrow, before returning to London and then beginning our Western Europe travels.
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